I did a short video below to explain the reason behind this blog post. I think this is probably one of the most important posts I have ever written. It is something that needs to be addressed to everyone because so many of us are stressed out and hurt from the affects of the world. This video is 10 minutes long, see why this post is so special to me. The rest of my blog post is below :) Enjoy!!
As people we are always striving for Order and Balance. It is never fun to be overwhelmed and stressed out. So if it is not fun, then why do we do it? Simply because we never take the time to stop and get a clear picture on what REALLY matters in life. This world throws thousands of different things in front of us daily to where we are constantly cluttered with too much stuff in our heads. It usually takes something serious to happen in order for us to finally pay attention and see what truly matters in life.
I want each person to carefully read what the image above says. Be honest and true with yourself and see what you would do with it. This is the truth!!! We are only promised each day!! We honestly cannot look at it as a whole, we need to take it minute by minute and day by day. People get so focused on what is happening tomorrow or next week or next month, and never just focus on the day at hand. I honestly feel if we truly just took it one day at a time, then we wouldn't be running around so chaotic. I am going to share personal struggles that I deal with in this blog post.
Several months ago I taught a Bible study in my home and the topic was "How To Have A Mary Heart In A Martha World." I have books sent to me to review because I blog and this particular book was sent to me. It even came along with Study Guides and a DVD series. I knew it was placed in my hands for a specific reason and I knew I had to share with women that I knew. I invited a small select group that I knew were hungry for Gods Word and wanted to truly grow in their faith walk. This was a two month series that I taught and I can honestly say we all learned so much. The image I posted above is something that I still struggle with today. The image reads "Sometimes it's okay if the only thing you did today was breathe." While teaching this series the Holy Spirit revealed to me that I had a "Martha Heart." I was constantly DOING and GOING from one thing to the next. My Husband and I were greatly involved in our church being used in every direction and leading groups and teaching etc. I got so used to being on autopilot that I didn't get a chance to just clear my calendar, sit back, and breathe. I realized that I had become a "people pleaser." I was constantly doing for everyone else around me and not taking care of myself properly. I naturally have an "ALL OR NOTHING" attitude so the word "MODERATION" didn't sit well with me at all. In fact it was completely foreign to me. I learned through this series that I had to learn to say NO to people. I had to learn that people ARE going to be offended and gossip about you, and it is ok. I had to realize that I didn't need to explain myself to anyone because as long as I had peace, and it lined up with Gods Word, then I was ok.
When we are believers and we have Jesus as our personal Lord and Savior then we know that we are not alone in this life. We no longer have to fight to swim up the current. We no longer have to worry about drowning or suffering. We know that we have been crucified with Christ and we are placed IN him. We are instructed as believers to rest IN him and to abide under the shadow of the Almighty. God does not make it hard for us. He makes easy enough for everyone!! We need to trust in him, and not be moved by the things we see. I have found with myself that when I was volunteering at our church I was giving EVERYTHING I had and when I came home I had nothing left for myself or for my family. I would counsel people for hours on the telephone while my daughter watched t.v. I was missing time with my daughter because I was a people pleaser and didn't learn boundaries. It took me to learn this by trial and error. I became dedicated to fitness and gave my EVERYTHING and then other areas of my life were slacking. I struggled to find a healthy balance. I would give myself completely in one area and then fall short in three other areas.
Each person has their own personal struggles so I really pray that this post speaks to you. I hope by me sharing my personal struggles, that maybe it might help at least one person. I had to STOP being a people pleaser and understand that I need to take care of myself first. If I am not good with myself then I am not good for anybody. I had to take that MUCH NEEDED time to close people out and focus on myself. I needed to grow in my own faith walk and take a long break from pouring into others. I spent so much of my time pouring into others and had the hardest time understanding why I was so empty on the inside. It seemed like I could help everyone else but myself. Of course people got offended along the way but to be 100% honest it is something that I cannot try and figure out, it is between them and God. I am only responsible for my part, and that is what I will have to answer for when I stand before God, and I can honestly say I am good with that. I had to learn to not take things so personal. Remember earlier above I mentioned that we need to get a clear visual of what REALLY matters in life? Well that is what I am talking about. When someone comes at you a certain way or is in a bad place and takes it out on you, we are to not take it personal. When we step back and access the situation we can understand that the person is in pain and is going through something themselves, and they do not know how to properly handle it. Maybe that person doesn't even have Jesus in their life. So instead of taking things personal and carrying around offense, I have had to learn to forgive without even asking for an apology. That person might not even know that I have forgiven them.
Through this life we are constantly HOLDING on to things and LETTING go of things. We find out quickly what works and what doesn't work. I have had to ask myself deep questions just so I could truly see where my head and heart were at with certain issues. I will give you the questions below of what I asked myself:
1) Can I honestly say that I am being the best wife that I can possible be? Is there more that I can do?
2) Am I doing everything I can for my children? Is there more that I can do?
3) Am I making excuses for myself? Am I playing games with myself?
4) What are the 3 most important things to me in life?
5) If today was my last day, would I be proud of my last day on earth?
6) What are some things that people would say about me after I am gone?
7) Have I been a true disciple of Jesus Christ on this earth?
8) Have I been seeking God with my WHOLE heart?
9) Am I being a hypocrite?
10) Am I truly living to please God and please him alone?
Maybe some of you need to ask yourself those questions and be real with yourself. You will have a true one on one with God. The next step is that when you find out those true answers then you need to come up with a plan. How can you stop your bad habits and start to make good ones?? You need to PLAN ON PURPOSE!! Get a list out and start writing!! Be realistic with yourself!! Post reminders up in certain areas of your house so you can truly succeed. Have accountability partners to check in with you once a week. Ask your family/spouse/friends/co-workers how you are doing on the areas you are trying to work on.
My last most important tip is........... TO SPEND QUALITY TIME WITH GOD!! The true revelation, wisdom, and change comes from him and reading his word. So many times we focus on what is wrong with everyone else and not with ourselves. When you are reading Gods word he begins to speak to you and it is in the most gentle correction you will ever receive. You won't have a God that is shouting at you and making you feel condemned. It will be a quiet whisper, it will be a gentle tap on the shoulder, you will feel two arms behind you hugging you. It is the most loving way of correction you will ever receive. So please I truly pray that this blog post spoke to you personally. Feel free to read it again. Sometimes when you read things several times, certain things will stand out each time you read it. I myself still continue to work on having a realistic balance, and I hope you are able to join me in that journey! :) God Bless!